It's official

At the new school the kids will be attending next year, there is a place on all the paperwork for the kids to sign that they agree to all of their new responsibilities.  There are different things such as a green to follow the rules and be respectful and always be kind.

So I made a big deal about it. We all read them together and I had the kids give some examples of what they thought it meant and then they signed.

I, for one, am feeling really good about this decision. Although it has not been an easy one to make overall, there are certainly parts that have made it quite easy.

I can see that Katie really needs to have a lot of time away from her brothers! And to be honest, so do I! Not in a bad way, just some time away. That's it.  I can also send that Katie just needs to hear these academic lessons and messages from someone else. They are playing too much on me being mom which makes it that much harder for me being teacher.

I can see Hunter needs to learn to hold himself in more. And hasn't that always been Hunter's problem! I think we swaddled him until he was about 7 months because he could not hold himself together. And the same is true now. When he gets frustrated, he acts out, is verbally obnoxious and just is not able to hold himself in. So he will have a quiet struggle while learning to hold himself in next year. So I am well aware that after school we will need to do a lot of out-breath activities! 

The struggle between me and Hunter has gotten to be exhausting for me. He fights me on just about everything and it is really starting to show up now in his academics. I have no doubt in my mind that he will be fine and will catch up to where he needs to be when he cannot argue so much with his teacher!  And doing the work simply becomes what everyone else is doing and the expectation given from someone other than a parent.

And then there is my sweet little Benjamin! He works hard and wants to please. But when I look at Benjamin I know he needs to have some time away from his brother and from me. He needs to find his own person in there. I think that is hard to do when he continues to do what he thinks I want him to do or what his brother wants to do. So I'm very excited to see the person that emerges from Benjamin with this new found sense of freedom he will get at school next year.

When we have good days, I would not exchange them for anything. But certainly the bad ones can be pretty bad. I am excited for them to have something of their own without me. I thought about getting a job at the school next year because they are hiring and then concluded that I think for their first year there it will be best that we all find our own way and where we fit all on our own. I don't feel it is that much about letting go, but rather about encouraging them to find themselves in a new place. And I truly believe that the time I have shared with them for these last two years has solidified their ability to be able to still be true to themselves and know who they are and fit no matter what new place they end up in.

Everyone is just ready.
It is also time for us to be part of some type of community here. Not that we are completely isolated living in the mountains. We are not! The kids have many friends. We get together and play quite often with friends. However, it will be nice to just volunteer in the classroom instead of having to be responsible for the entire classroom myself. I can just help with homework instead of designing what the homework will be.  So I am excited to be part of an already established community versus having to create a school community in my own home.

Overall, these changes will be big. But with big change comes many beautiful outcomes and opportunities that would not arrive otherwise without the shift that comes with that change.